My Ramblings

hah! been long since i last update thing ting. okae. not dat long lahh.. a few days onlie mahh... but guess i'll continue not 2 update cos ders simply nothing much dats happening in my life.. okae. if der is oso, i shall not wish 2 update cos i cant b bothered.. aniwaes, in-course assessments r around de corner. so i gotta buck up larr.. haix... mux study nomatter wad. haix. my brain is blank since "it" started. i jz cant think properly. u all will say, "dont b sad lah. why so sad? cheer up gerl.." dats de words which i nvr fail 2 hear. haix.. i noe u all r concern abt me bt i dunoe lahh.. i jz cant think properly.. i'll daydream. daydream abt u. i think abt u day n nite n wen i do dat, i'll tend 2 cry. im jz so sad. so miserable wen u're not ard. i noe u wont noe im doin all dix. cos u simply wont noe. noone else noes unless u read my blog. haix.. im jz so depressed. i cant stop myself from thinkin abt u. u r always on my mind. people tell me 2 leave u n say dat ders other guys hu will appreciate me but still i insist on staying. i dunoe y. love is blind. im crying. crying so badly. i jz cant let u go. tho people r saying things. i dont wanna listen. i dont want 2. i choose not to. tho dey said it'll affect me jz 2 think abt dix. n sum asked me 2 think properly. deep thinking. but,i cant bring myself 2 do dat. im too soft-hearted. im too weak. ppl hu noe me well,dey'll noe im weak at hart. im too tolerant. im too soft. dats my weakness. i duno 4 how long i can take dix. i dunoe when i'll jz drop n die. i dunoe. im still hanging on der. waitin n waiting 4 u 2 come 2 me. n pls, do come back 2me. im waitin 4 ur ans. ur good ans. ur own decision n i hope it'll b a good news. as wad ppl told me. im still waiting. waiting 4 u 2 come back n rescue me. haix.. n thank god, ur mom understood me. i thank god 4 havin someone hu can understand me tho she's ur mom n a much older person den me. i hope dat her words or advice will help u out in making ur decision. im hoping 4 all dat 2 happen. at least she cheered me up 4 a while. wid her sweet words n advice. but guess, i gotta wait. wait 4 ur one n only decision. n i hope it'll b soon. i dunoe 4 how long i can wait. haix.
im jz so terribly sad.
i shud bought de punching bag since i cant slash my wrist. it'll b a good replacement in de mean time. but too bad, i dont haf. so de pillows shall b my victims. haizzz.

always and forever lovin' you;
8:44 PM

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