My Ramblings

im like so fucked up. serious. first thing 1st, arif sms-ed me asking hu's de otha sumone. n i told him. i just cant keep it hiding anymore. i noe it's cruel of me but all i gotta do is just 2 be honest. but it doesnt pay it all. being honest doesnt pay. fcuk. i told him it's farhan. yes,it's farhan. n he said tanx 4 hurting him 4 de 2nd time. n i replied back ur veri welcum. simply cox i was already fuck up. screwed up all. im stressed over things he said. datz de reason. he make it a point so dat i wud hate him. n he got it all. i hate him!! i hate u. im gonna be honest now. i dun care. hell care. i was out wid farhan jz now. but ur words dint hurt our outing. we really had a great time. he comforted me. willing 2 take me knowing abt u. YES,he is a willing party. i dint regret choosing him instead. he's gonna heal my broken hart.


here's wad arif sms me. im gonna reveal it all since it's my blog. i dun care wad ppl say animore. dox frens of mine understood me. asilah, li ting, janice. true frens. im such contented having em in my life. tanx gerls. appreciate ur advice n help. i duno wad i'll be widout u ppl.
he said," u're rite im gonna hate u... jz lyk wad i did 2 liyana.. hope kau bahgia ngn hidup kau.. jgn carik aku lagi.. anggap aku tk wujud dalam hidup kau..." syla,sum words mcm penah dgr kan?? tapi dimana ya? haha.. btw, i translated sum of de malay words 2 eng words cox it'll be better 4 de non-malays 2 read em... nexxt, "u wait 4 wat i'll send to ur doorstep.. dun nd 2 reply.. coz i dun wanna c ur name on ma fon.. wat 4 b hurt... u dumped me.. u shud be hapi aite.. hahahakz".... den," u r really cruel.. tak sangke skalipun... go u wid de cleaner.. hope he plays ur back..'bie'? itss history"... maybe he dint realise he humiliated farhan's ex-job.. he dint remember things. i'll make him remember. u were once a cleaner. mind u! so dun humiliate ppl's job s long s it's thier hard earn money okay... "did u dump u? sape yg kejam?(hu's de cruel one?) eh pompan... pikir ar btul2.. kalau tak kau buat aku mcm gni... aku tak ckp kate2 g2.. pikir ar.." de last one, "kau nak salahkan aku.. (u want 2 blame me).. eh sudah la.. kau tak sudah2 ke nak kecaikan hati aku.. ckp ar... see how cruel human beings can get??? i thot dix ppl wun exist bt it proved me wrong. haix. n u proved me wrong. de best gift. tanx.


aniwae,i cried in de mrt 4 ur info. it was ur words. ur cruel words. i tried 2 control but i cudnt. at least i manage 2 wipe em jz in time b4 ppl notice it. now i realise de different u. u cant wait 2 call me "kau" rite. i guess so. but nomatter wad,i wun talk so rude 2 my exs. im always using "i" n "u" wid my exs. onlie wid de frens den i use "kau". but guess u cudnt wait yah. let it be okays. sumtimes i just feel it's no use 4 me 2 cry. cry over sumone like u. it's not worth it. hell not worth it. im fighting over a weak hart. n de presence of farhan n frens like syla,li ting n janice will support de weak hart. i wun fall back. i'll get de happiness i desired 4.. i'll be happy wid my choice.. of course... dats a definite ans.. haha... im not gonna lay back n let u destroy my life. i wun do dat... im not scared.. neither m i afraid or wadeva u name it... i will fight back. not physically bt emotionally... wid words... i'll update more tml... im gonna sleep 4 now...


"i dun noe why i like u so much.. i gave u all my trust... i told u.. i luv u.. now it's all down de drain, u put me thru vain... i wana let u noe... Fuck wad i said, u dun mean shit now. fuck up presence might s well grow up now. fuck all dox pieces. fuck u,u all. i dun want u back. "
niice song... goes well wid de situation... hahaha...

always and forever lovin' you;
11:17 PM

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